coffee and nicotine patch

MindWandering, TrueStory

and eventually a cigarette on the way to school.. we have 970% more relapse casses compare to heroin addicts. go figure. the fact that the americans (a sample population – since i cant fine a statistical survey for the whole world) spend more money on tobacco and alcohol every year then they do on education does say something about the urghhh habbit. its ok, eventually i’ll pass it. theres this tribe somewhere in the steppes of an ex-soviet union country, in their native language, the word for the sky directly translate to “blue” for the reason that no matter how grey the sky is, above the clouds, the sky is always blue. i thought that was pretty and very inspiring. a lot of people are looking for inspirations these days. i could use some crative juices now. i got myself painting supplies and a canvas with an easel to go with it. i remember when i started painting how soothing and how relaxing it was. i really suck at it but the acrylic and the canvas made it look so cool – no matter how ugly it is. my trick is to fill that canvas with as many different form and obects as i can – to make it look fuller. whatever. we’ll see how this goes. i dont need to talk to or to depend to somebody for my “creative juices”. i have a natural gland for it and im glad i do.

i still cant beleive that we made a profit from the keg. doris and i was ready to pay the difference and we were really dead broke. had it not because of coconut cove, i would have an extra 15 bucks in my pocket. gaahhhh… oh well, the heg was kicked anyways but it was a good party. i love it. old friends and new friends and so may people with good vibes. we had eggs, hot dogs and burgers throughout the day and that was great. at around 2 or so, when it was somewhat nice out, we were playing croquet and bachi (i dont think this is the right spelling but the pronunciation is ba-chi) and it was great. around 20 people were on the yard playing 2 different games and occasionally we play soccer which always a good time.

whatever. im feeling shitty this morning. maybe its just a case of the mondays.

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